Most of the blogs in this website talk about the importance of being present. When I am present, there’s no thought of past or future. I feel however, that in order to throw my past away, I have to seriously reflect on my past. Meditate on it. Be familiar with it.
We say, forgive and forget (the past). It’s a quality of the Lord. We rightly say, “To err is human, to forgive is divine!”. This meditation, which I need to do about my past, has two components. What I did (to err) and what He, the Lord did (to forgive) as a response.
Meditating on first component, the result is repentance, an intense feeling of regret. And meditating on the second component, the result is gratefulness, an intense feeling of gratitude!
If I meditate on “to err” side, I honestly see how damaging my acts were, to me, and to the people around me. I come to know how many people I hurt. I come to know the meaninglessness of my frivolous motives behind those acts. Know the ephemerality of the fruits of those acts. And most importantly, I become aware of who was running the show full of misery. I become aware of the greatest demon who dwells inside me, the Ravana, the Ego.
If I meditate on “to forgive” side, I see providence everywhere. I see how I got saved from horrible outcomes, in so many situations. How probability was turned in favor of me. How much love I got from the same people who I hurt before. How my needs have been timely addressed. How my loss is always kept minimal in spite of my dangerous, outrageous misadventures. How I have been constantly reminded of the Lord who works so tirelessly to make me free!
I cannot meditate just on the first component without considering the second one. Both are intricately woven together. This all-comprehensive meditation on my past, will make me more humble, more grateful, and thereby ultimately, make me Surrender. This surrender is composed of both the sense of repentance as well as the sense of gratitude. Then, as Michael Singer says, I truly start living from the place of Surrender! Ever Joyous, in a bliss!
Reinvent The Self! 